Quotes from book

The Red Pyramid

“Have you ever noticed how parents can go from the most wonderful people in the world to totally embarrassing in three seconds?”

“Oh no." I said panic rising in my chest. "No, no, no, Somebody get a can opener. I've got a god in my head!!”

“Fairness does not mean everyone gets the same. Fairness means everyone gets what they need.”

“There’s nothing here,” Carter said.
“What do you want?” I asked. “We’ve got wax, some toilet papyrus, an ugly statue.”

“To all my librarian friends, champions of books, true magicians in the House of Life. Without you, this writer would be lost in the Dust.”

“The first thing we pulled out was a lump of white gunk.
“Wax,” Carter pronounced.
“Fascinating.”

“Ah, Mastery of the Five Elements!"
"Is that the one we want?" I asked.
"No, but a good one. How to tame the five essential elements of the universe - earth, air, water, fire, and cheese!"
"Cheese?”

“Me? I slept like the dead, which I hoped wasn’t a sign of things to come.”

“One the next corner stood a cinder block restaurant with a hand-painted sign that read CHICKEN & WAFFLES. There was a queue of twenty people outside.
“You Americans have the strangest taste. What planet is this?”

“Do you give up?" Shezmu bellowed.
"No!" I yelled. "No, we don't give up. We will name you. Just… Gosh, you're quite well muscled, arn't you? Do you work out?”

“Set screamed something in Ancient Egyptian. I was fairly sure it wasn’t a compliment.
“I will rend your limbs from their sockets!” he shouted. “I will—”
“Die?” Carter suggested.”

“Ever hold your hand over a torch (sorry, a flashlight for you Americans).”

“I frowned. “You mean Set’s got, like, other evil gods on speed dial?”

“I grabbed a pair of glowing red legs.”

“Being turned into a lizard can really mess up your day.”

“Apparently, word of the chicken man incident hadn’t spread quite yet.”

“We were alone in a strange mansion with a baboon, a crocodile, and a weird cat. And apparently, the entire world was in danger.
I looked at Sadie. “What do we do now?”

“Anubis frowned. He locked his very nice eyes with mine.
“You’re not dead.”
“No,” I said. “Though we’re trying awfully hard.”

“Gods have great power, but only humans have creativity, the power to change history.”