“Never trust a pretty girl with an ugly secret.”

“Slutkiss girls, won't you promise her smack?
Is she pretty on the inside?
Is she pretty from the back?
Slutkiss girls, won't you water her rack?
Is she pretty on the inside?
Is she pretty from the back?
Slutkiss girl, molasses, rot blackstrap
Is she rotten on the inside
Is she ugly, ugly from the back?”

“Most really pretty girls have pretty ugly feet, and so does Mindy Metalman, Lenore notices, all of a sudden.”

“Trust a girl of sixteen for knowing well if she is pretty; concerning her plainness she may be ignorant.”

“The secret of a long life is to never trust a doctor.”

“Sometimes I think I’ll never trust another girl the way I trust you.”

“I am not a pretty girl. I don't want to be a pretty girl. No, I want to be more than a pretty girl.”

“There are only two things: love, all sorts of love, with pretty girls, and the music of New Orleans or Duke Ellington. Everything else ought to go, because everything else is ugly.”

“Secrets with girls, like loaded guns with boys,
Are never valued till they make a noise.”

“You should take more pride in your appearance,” I tell him. “You'll never attract girls with an ugly mug like that.”