“Tact: the ability to describe others as they see themselves.”

—  Abraham Lincoln

Last update Oct. 1, 2023. History

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Abraham Lincoln photo
Abraham Lincoln 618
16th President of the United States 1809–1865

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Winston S. Churchill quote: “Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.”
Winston S. Churchill photo

“Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.”

Winston S. Churchill (1874–1965) Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

This appears to be a variation of a quote often attributed to Caskie Stinnett in 1960, "A diplomat...is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip" https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=kcycAQAAQBAJ&pg=PA90&dq=%22A+diplomat+is+a+person+who+can+tell+you+to+go+to+hell+in+such+a+way+that+you+actually+look+forward+to+the+trip.%22 but which appears to have been in common use in the 1950s and is first recorded in the Seattle Daily Times in 1953 as "Diplomat—one who can tell you to go to hades and make you look forward to the trip". http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/a_diplomat_is_a_person_who_can_tell_you_to_go_to_hell_so_that_you_look_forw/
Misattributed
Variant: Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions

Harry Truman photo

“Tact is the ability to step on a man's toes without messing up the shine on his shoes.”

Harry Truman (1884–1972) American politician, 33rd president of the United States (in office from 1945 to 1953)

“Scientists are not known for the graces of courtesy and tact when commenting on the work of others.”

Scott L. Montgomery (1951) American geologist and writer

The Chicago Guide to Communicating Science, second edition, University of Chicago press, 2017, page 83 ISBN 978-0-226-14450-4.

“Wouldn't it be conceited to suggest that I had the abilities to describe the deity?”

John Marks Templeton (1912–2008) stock investor, businessman and philanthropist

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Context: We may find the Divine to be 3,000 times what we think it is now. It's like asking the tulip there to explain you. The tulip is a beautiful creation, with millions of atoms cooperating with each other to produce great beauty, but ask that tulip to talk about you, and it can't do it. It doesn't have those perceptive abilities. Wouldn't it be conceited to suggest that I had the abilities to describe the deity?

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“To see ourselves as others see us is a most salutary gift. Hardly less important is the capacity to see others as they see themselves.”

Aldous Huxley book The Doors of Perception

Page 159
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“Technology is often described as ‘neutral’. But it could be more accurately described as power and freedom. For the transhumanists, technology provides the ability to stride across the universe, to live for ever. For the anarcho-primitivists, it is a tool used to oppress and control others, to become less than human.”

Jamie Bartlett book The Dark Net: Inside the Digital Underworld

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“With some people solitariness is an escape not from others but from themselves. For they see in the eyes of others only a reflection of themselves.”

Eric Hoffer (1898–1983) American philosopher

Section 211
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“If you declare Crocker's Rules, other people don't need to worry about being tactful to you.”

Eliezer Yudkowsky (1979) American blogger, writer, and artificial intelligence researcher

Promoting "Crocker's Rules" in "An Introduction to SL4" (2002) http://www.sl4.org/intro.html
Context: If you declare Crocker's Rules, other people don't need to worry about being tactful to you. (You still need to worry about being tactful to them — Crocker's Rules only work one way.)

“When I see myself, I wonder: what do others try to see in themselves?”

Antonio Porchia (1885–1968) Italian Argentinian poet

Viéndome, me pregunto: ¿qué pretenden verse los demás?
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“Although humans and baboons may fight among themselves, dominate others, and keep harems, only humans have the ability to give pious excuses for what they do.”

Arnold M. Ludwig

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