“They're a little strange, but I'm pretty sure neither of them is going to try to make me uncomfortable by stripping naked.”

“Most of the time you don't even know they're there. Now, that's the scary thing. It's really strange and invading, but I'm still working it all out. I try to not let it bother me. And if I want to swim naked in my pool, I'm still going to do it. I certainly don't want to feel that I have to change everything in my life that I do to cater to them. I just won't let it happen.”

“The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.”

“If I'm in a bad mood, or if I'm uncomfortable, it's probably what I'm wearing that's making me feel that way.”

“Some friends of mine asked me if I wanted to go to a strip club, and I didn't… want to go. But I ended up going, 'cause—back me up on this, fellas—once you've seen one woman naked, you… wanna see the rest of 'em naked. It can be an old biker chick, you know they're gonna hang down to here. "Wanna see my titties!?" "Yeah, I do!" [cringes] "All right, that's enough, roll 'em back up!" [imitates her rolling her breasts back up and sealing them in place. ] The things that make you go [shudders]”

“Go away. I hate everyone right now, and I'm pretty sure that includes you.”

“Help! I'm David of Sesame Street, and they're trying to kill me!”

“Well they're pissed off and they're hungry. I was kind of busy trying not to get my brains eaten. They seemed pretty adamant about the brain-eating thing. Then they're going to IKEA, I guess”

“And make sure you tell daddy
That I'm still his little girl
Yeah I still feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be
But don't forget to remember me”

“I'll kiss you until we can't breathe. I'll strip you naked and taste every inch of you. Then I'll shag you until neither of us can see straight.”