“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.”

Last update March 22, 2022. History

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“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand.
We listen to reply.”

Stephen R. Covey (1932–2012) American educator, author, businessman and motivational speaker

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

Stephen R. Covey book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Source: The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People (1989), p. 239
Source: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change

“Part of doing something is listening. We are listening. To the sun. To the stars. To the wind.”

Madeleine L'Engle (1918–2007) American writer

Source: Swiftly Tilting Planet

“To listen is not merely to hear. We in life, hear but very rarely do we know how to listen. To Listen is to hear, with an intellectual alertness and attention of awareness.”

Chinmayananda Saraswati (1916–1993) Indian spiritual teacher

Quotations from Gurudev’s teachings, Chinmya Mission Chicago

“I think that individual voices are not as strong as a community of voices. If we can make a community of voices, then we can speak more truth. Also in a community, we learn to listen…”

Maxine Hong Kingston (1940) Chinese American author

Source: On the strength of a community in “’I Can Write My Shadow’: Alexis Cheung Interviews Maxine Hong Kingston” https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/can-write-shadow-alexis-cheung-interviews-maxine-hong-kingston/ in Los Angeles Review of Books (2016 Dec 22)

“We hang out, we help one another, we tell one another our worst fears and biggest secrets, and then just like real sisters, we listen and don't judge.”

Adriana Trigiani (1970) American film director

Source: Viola in Reel Life

“I cannot come in with preconceptions of any issue. I need to listen what we can do to resolve and heal the wounds left in the community.”

Michael J. Byrnes (1958) American Roman Catholic archbishop

An interview with Coadjutor Archbishop Michael Byrnes https://www.postguam.com/news/local/an-interview-with-coadjutor-archbishop-michael-byrnes/article_4718c446-a175-11e6-aa88-ab3f00f938d3.html (November 4, 2016)

“One friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen to us as we consider our problem, can change our whole outlook on the world.”

Elton Mayo (1880–1949) Australian academic

Elton Mayo, cited in: Edward William Bok (1947), Ladies' Home Journal.Vol. 64, p. 246

“Of course black lives matter. But instead of people pointing fingers at each other and just creating strife, what we need to be talking about is: How do we solve problems in the black community? … Whether I get the votes or not, I want people to start listening to what I am saying and understanding that … there is a way to go that will lead to upward mobility as opposed to dependency.”

Ben Carson (1951) 17th and current United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development; American neurosurgeon

Speech in Harlem https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/republicans-should-follow-ben-carsons-lead-on-black-lives-matter/2015/08/17/cd242572-44d7-11e5-8e7d-9c033e6745d8_story.html (August 2015).

“And no one will listen to us until we listen to ourselves.”

Marianne Williamson (1952) American writer

“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.”

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