“Mr. Britton, don't be a wise guy, because I'm gonna mop up the floor with you if you're a wise guy to me. This is my playpen, not yours.”

“Don't be a wise guy in here, sir. There's only one wise person in here - and that's Byrd.”

“Nobody likes to see a stupid guy wise up.”

“You're probably thinkin’ that you're gonna change me;
In some ways well maybe you might.
Scrub me down, dress me up.
Oh but no matter what,
Remember, I'm still a guy.”

“Don't choose the better guy, choose the guy that's gonna make you the better girl”

“Hey guys, there isn't gonna be a Plan B. You called me in to bring the thunder and that's what I'm gonna do.”

“I'll tell you what. I've been in combat. I've seen it, I've been close to it… and if my unit is in danger, and I've got a captured guy, and the guy knows where the enemy is, and I'm looking him in the eye, the guy better tell me. That's all I'm gonna tell you. The guy better tell me. If it's life or death, he's going first.”

“So you're a tough guy
Like-it-really-rough guy
Just-can't-get-enough guy
Chest-always-so-puffed guy
I'm that bad type
Make-your-mama-sad type
Make-your-girlfriend-mad type
Might-seduce-your-dad type
I'm the bad guy, duh
I'm the bad guy”

“You only like guys you don't have a chance with, because you're scared.”

“I got into a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."”