“Scaring the children: for Halloween last night, I dressed as a Democrat and when kids came to my door, I took half of their candy!”

The End (2006)

The Carnegie Hall Performance (2006)

Source: The Pill vs. the Springhill Mine Disaster

Revelations of Divine Love (c. 1393), Chapter 3
Context: When I was thirty years old and a half, God sent me a bodily sickness, in which I lay three days and three nights; and on the fourth night I took all my rites of Holy Church, and weened not to have lived till day. And after this I languored forth two days and two nights, and on the third night I weened oftentimes to have passed; and so weened they that were with me.
And being in youth as yet, I thought it great sorrow to die; — but for nothing that was in earth that meliked to live for, nor for no pain that I had fear of: for I trusted in God of His mercy. But it was to have lived that I might have loved God better, and longer time, that I might have the more knowing and loving of God in bliss of Heaven. For methought all the time that I had lived here so little and so short in regard of that endless bliss, — I thought nothing.

Talking about an unsuccessful performance of Alice's Restaurant Massacre, and how his children who were onstage for the performance did not know how to help him. (Live in Sydney)

1999-10-29
Television series
Politically Incorrect
ABC
2010-09-20
Profile: Christine O'Donnell, Delaware Senate candidate
BBC
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11378369
2010-10-20
TV appearances

18 September 2013 https://twitter.com/alka_seltzer666/status/380346681117507584
Twitter https://twitter.com/alka_seltzer666 posts

One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun..
EMO² (1985)