“A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner upon his table, than when his wife talks Greek.”

“Or, to state his character as it stood in the scale of public opinion, when his friends and critics were in tantrums, he was considered rather a bad man; when they were pleased, he was rather a good man; when they were neither, he was a man whose moral colour was a kind of pepper-and-salt mixture.”

“Always contented with his life,
and with his dinner, and his wife.”

“A council to a magistrate, who is himself responsible for what he does, are generally nothing better than a clog upon his good intentions, are often the instruments and accomplices of his bad and are almost always a cloak to his faults.”

“Her talking about the Obama Administration has done a great job and deserves an A on the economy. I mean, please, let's talk to American families and sit around the dinner table at night figuring how to pay their bills. The American economy is not in good shape; productivity is failing.”

“When a man takes a mistress, he doesn't turn around and divorce his wife.”

“A married man seeks to please his wife and not God.”

“I can charge a man's battery, and then recharge it, and recharge it again. But it is only when he has his own generator that we can talk about motivation. He then needs no outside stimulation. He wants to do it.”

“When a man tells me he's going to put all his cards on the table, I always look up his sleeve.”

“If ye loved him, he must ha' been a good man.'
'Yes, he… was.'
'Then I shall do my best to honor his spirit by serving his wife.”