“I sort of sympathise with them looking for weapons of mass destruction, because I'm like that with scissors. Honestly, I just turn the house upside down. Of course the difference is, I know I have got some scissors.”

— Linda Smith

A Brief History of Timewasting, Room 101, The News Quiz

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Linda Smith 30

comedian 1958–2006

Mitch Hedberg (1968–2005) American stand-up comedian

Just For Laughs: On The Edge - 2002

“I remember the feeling. Whenever my father got so absorbed in a book that we might have been in visible I felt like taking a pair of scissors and cutting it up.”

Cornelia Funke (1958) author

“Like I say, the way I write songs is, you know, inspirational. I have to wait for it to happen. And when it happens I get lines, and I just write them down, you know. I'm not sort of a Tin Pan Alley sort of songwriter. I just sort of write down what I get - without censoring or questioning what it is and what it means, you know. Like later on I look at what it means, but not at the time.”

Van Morrison (1945) Northern Irish singer-songwriter and musician

"Nights in Copenhagen with Van Morrison" (1985) interview by Al Jones

“Of course, we're there because of weapons of mass destruction that do not exist.”

Margaret Cho (1968) American stand-up comedian

From Her Books, I Have Chosen To Stay And Fight, WAR

“It feels like the whole world has turned upside down. There aren't any more rules.

Hey,' I say to Sam, because if the world's gone crazy, then I guess I can do whatever I want. "Guess what? I'm a worker.”

Holly Black book White Cat

Source: White Cat

“Since I know that about a million people have been killed by the government of Iraq, I do not need much those weapons of mass destruction.”

Martti Ahtisaari (1937) Finnish politician and former President of Finland

Defending the US government decision to invade Iraq, as quoted in "Nobel Finn" in Wall Street Journal (11 October 2008) http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122367870922824537.html?mod=googlenews_wsj

“If I met you in a scissor fight, I'd cut off both your wings on principle alone.”

Brandon Boyd (1976) American rock singer, writer and visual artist

Lyrics, A Crow Left of the Murder... (2004)

“As I have said throughout, I have no doubt that they will find the clearest possible evidence of Saddam's weapons of mass destruction.”

Tony Blair (1953) former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

Hansard http://www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm200203/cmhansrd/vo030604/debtext/30604-06.htm, House of Commons, 6th series, vol. 406, col. 161.
Replying to questions following statement on the G8 summit, House of Commons, 4 June 2003.
2000s

“Like a fool, I fell in love with you,
Turned my whole world upside down”

Eric Clapton (1945) English musician, singer, songwriter, and guitarist

“Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere… Nope, no weapons over there… Maybe under here.”

George W. Bush (1946) 43rd President of the United States

Narrating a humorous slide show at the Radio and Television News Correspondents Association, with a series of photos depicting himself searching through the Oval Office of the White House for the weapons of mass destruction which his administration had claimed to exist, but ultimately failed to find, in Iraq. http://www.wherearethewmd.org/evolutionary_rhetoric.php, March 25, 2004
2000s, 2004

“I sort of sympathise with them looking for weapons of mass destruction, because I'm like that with scissors. Honestly, I just turn the house upside down. Of course the difference is, I know I have got some scissors.”

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Linda Smith 30

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