“It's actually quite difficult to stay awake while watch golf on television. It's a great sleep inducer. I think this is why the commentators in golf whisper. They don't want to wake you up. 'Looks like Tiger has about a twenty foot putt, and while he's lining it up I'll take this opportunity to sing "Rock-a-Bye baby,…"”

Comedy Central Presents Jeff Stilson (2003)

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Jeff Stilson5

American comedian

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Halldór Laxness (1902–1998) Icelandic author

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“Late at night the horses stumble
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I lie on my elbow watching
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Kenneth Rexroth (1905–1982) American poet, writer, anarchist, academic and conscientious objector

In Defense of the Earth (1956), The Great Nebula of Andromeda

“I don't think we have a future. I know we do. I want to marry you and have kids and be a stay-at-home writer dad while you take Boston journalism by storm. I want to wake up beside you every day for the rest of my life.”

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“I'm sleeping like a baby, too. Every two hours, I wake up, screaming.”

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“Don't worry about that baby. I love babies. I hear that baby crying, I like it. What a baby. What a beautiful baby. Don't worry, don't worry. The mom's running around like—don't worry about it, you know. It's young and beautiful and healthy and that's what we want. […] Actually, I was only kidding, you can get the baby out of here. That's all right. Don't worry. I, I think she really believed me that I love having a baby crying while I'm speaking. That's OK. People don't understand. That's OK.”

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“Sometimes I sit up in the darkness,
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Philip Pullman book The Amber Spyglass

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Babe Ruth (1895–1948) American baseball player

As quoted in "Babe Ruth, Idle First time In 23 Years, Blames His Legs" by Grantland Rice, in The Baltimore Sun (February 19, 1936), p. 14

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Jeff Stilson5

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