“Reporter: Do you mean to say that if Israel did not exist, there would suddenly be democracy in Egypt, that the schools in Morocco would be better, that the public clinics in Jordan would function better?Sheikh: I think so.”

“I think it would not work. I would be very jealous. It would be better if it was just sex.”

“I think there is something in the genetic code that deals with the disposition towards gentleness or meanness, and I think in God's perfect law, if we would continually eliminate, execute people that do these certain crimes, we would gradually get a much better society that… not so many people have this "mean gene" in them.”

“I have always done my sketches, as people would say, for the fun of it… I have worked to amuse myself, and if it has amused the public as well, so much the better for me.”

“Depression is boring, I think
and I would do better to make
some soup and light up the cave.”

“You (Israel) do have a peace agreement with Egypt. You do have a peace agreement with Jordan, and some kind of understandings with the Palestinians. But this is not the limit of the scope of where you belong. Israel is a country in the Middle East. Israel is part of this heritage of this whole region historically. So the Jewish people have a place amongst us. So communication needs to be a prerequisite for solving all the dispute. We should talk.”

“I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't. ”

“I mean, if 10 years from now, when you are doing something quick and dirty, you suddenly visualize that I am looking over your shoulders and say to yourself "Dijkstra would not have liked this", well, that would be enough immortality for me.”

“Hey, Neil, a reporter asked me would I appoint a Muslim to my administration. I did say no, and here's why. The reporter didn't tell you this. I would have to have people totally committed to the Declaration and the Constitution of the United States and the laws of this country.”

“I would say that music is the easiest means in which to express, but since words are my talent, I must try to express clumsily in words what the pure music would have done better.”