
“I like whiskey. I always did, and that is why I never drink it.”
Source: Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World
“I like whiskey. I always did, and that is why I never drink it.”
“Whiskey is for drinking. Water is for fighting over.”
It seems likely that the attribution to Twain is apocryphal. It is not listed as authentic on Twainquotes http://twainquotes.com/, and is not listed at all in either R. Ken Ramussen's The Quotable Mark Twain (1998) or David W. Barber's Quotable Twain (2002)
Misattributed
“Woman is a masterpiece of art to be admired and appreciated in her universal beauty.”
Original: La donna è un capolavoro d'arte da ammirare ed apprezzare nella sua bellezza universale.
Source: prevale.net
“First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.”
Variant: First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.