“First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend”

“If man was devolving into a psychotic pit of rotted plasma, [Karl] Rove would be the Alpha of such grime.”

“If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed.”

“If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed.”

“When you're eight or nine years old and you look at the TV set men are landing on the moon — anything is possible. And that is something we need to not lose sight of, is that the inspiration and permission to dream is immense.”

“When I was four I thought everything in TV was just TV, then I was five and Ma unlied about lots of it being pictures of real and Outside being totally real. Now I’m in Outside but it turns out lots of it isn’t real at all.”

“TV is not good at covering single events. It needs a ritual, a rhythm, and a pattern…[TV] tends to fosters patterns rather than events.”

“Well, in the first place girls never marry the men they flirt with. Girls don't think it right.”

“I feel like I am floating in plasma
I need a teacher or a lover
I need someone to risk being involved with me.
I am so vain
and I am so masochistic.
How can they coexist?”

“Rich people have small TVs and big libraries, and poor people have small libraries and big TVs.”