“You just walk over there and into the office and say, 'Hey, be my prom date,'" he said. "It's that simple.”

“They say you just stand over there, he'll say thank you and you walk back off and that's what I thought was gonna happen, but in my head, I had for five or six years known that he was gonna call me over.”

“"Getting you a date to prom is so hard that the hypothetical idea itself is actually used to cut diamonds," I added.”

“White Chocolate. Intense, sweet. But not deep. Okay for prom dates or flings, but not to get serious.. Milk chocolates are guys you could date for like a few months, and dark chocolates are for love.”

“Dead, cold quiet, until he walked up. He looked at me… he walked past me and then I heard in my head. It said, 'Do it, do it, do it,' over and over again.”

“I'm not good at the protocols of dating. [laughs] I'm not really experienced in that. My girlfriend is my second or third girlfriend. I think in the past none of us really knew when we were "dating"-we were just hanging out and doing things. I didn't go to high school so I missed the prom.”

“Hey, would you like a date? I have a hammer!?”

“He walked out of the office to find Kevin Daley standing there. 'I like your style,' Kevin said.
Thank you,' Alex said. 'I like it, too.”

“Someone walked up to me the other day and went "Excuse me… Can you show me where the station is, please?" I said "Yes, officer, if you just…"”

“Junior faculty members used to come up to me and say. "Wow, you got tenure early; what's your secret?" I said, "It's pretty simple, call me any Friday night in my office at 10 o'clock and I'll tell you."”