“I love my pizza so much, in fact, that I have come to believe in my delirium that my pizza might actually love me, in return. I am having a relationship with this pizza, almost an affair.”

“You called me and said you were home and wanted to go out for a pizza."
"I did? What time is it?"
"Time for pizza," [Catarina] replied.”

“It's not the pizza, darlin', its my masculine presence."
Joe Morelli”

“I have a computer, a vibrator, and pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house? " - Tabitha”

“I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!"”

“He's frozen pizza.”

“Please go to this pizzeria. Order the margherita pizza with double mozzarella. If you do not eat this pizza when you are in Naples, please lie to me and tell me that you did.”

“In the name of the Pizza Lord. Charge!”

“The first time I felt I was famous was when I went to the movies with my mom. I had gone to the loo, and someone in the bathroom said in a very loud voice, "Girl in stall No. 1 were you in "Mystic Pizza?"”

“I have no Politics. I am for the Party that is out of Power, no matter which one it is. But I will give you my word that, in case of my appointment, I will not be a Republican; I will do my best to pull with you, and not embarrass you. In fact, my views on European affairs are so in accord with you, Mr. President, that I might almost be suspected of being a Democrat.”