“(About Oprah Winfrey) She's very thin now, she's very cranky….. and very hungry!”

“There will be good days and bad, which means that some days I may be cranky and some days really cranky!”

“I’m not him and he’s not me, but what I’m required to do for him and what I am enabled to do for him is what makes it like me. It fits my particular talents and skills very well. So in that respect, yeah, he is me, but I am not the cranky, sarcastic, underachieving kind of guy that he is. He’s easy to fall in, I will say that.”

“You are not mean. Cranky is different.”

“Excruciating agony makes me cranky.”

“Akri infallible. Well, except for a couple of things, and we don’t talk about those ‘cause it makes akri cranky. I like that word ‘infallible.’ It just like me. Infallible. (Simi)”

“There is no better ballast for keeping the mind steady on its keel, and saving it from all risk of crankiness, than business.”

“People think I'm eccentric, cranky. If I'm eccentric because I've never been into mainstream things, then I am eccentric.”

“(Man on television) Man is the hunter. Woman is the civilizing influence, and when women abandon that role, men become (Sylvia) Cranky, and start wars.”

“Hadn't one of my all-time favorite reveries been to become a cranky hermit, live unperturbed in my house, and have things brought to me like a monarch or tribal lord?”