“I don't blame Bill Maher for mocking religion. […] I can see why he took the trouble to make the movie. In one sense, it's overdue.”

“I saw Stay as You Are and Tess only. I didn't ask her if she saw every movie I did. I could never think about that. Why do I have to see every movie she did? Why? Sometimes she did movies with people I was bored by. I don't care about this or that director. So if she is so beautiful in a movie, it is because of her, not a director. So why should I see the movie then? As long as I am not blind, I don't need a dog to see. If I am blind, maybe I would like the dog to lead me. I am not blind. I don't have to see her movies. I know my child.”

“Sure, Kill Bills a violent movie. But it's a Tarantino movie. You don't go to see Metallica and ask the fuckers to turn the music down.”

“I don't know why people expect art to make sense. Life doesn't make sense.”

“Don't blame me," he said, surprised at her reaction. "Blame human nature. I didn't make the world.”

“What trouble have you brought to my doorstep, Beka?" she asked.
"I don't see where blaming me for things that began months ago will be useful," I replied.”

“Why do I continue making movies? Making movies is better than cleaning toilets.”

“Because there is safety in derision
I talked about an apparition,
I took no trouble to convince,
Or seem plausible to a man of sense.”

“"How can a movie be "one of the best"? There's only one "best" movie, so saying something is "one of the best" is stupid and doesn't make sense. Technically any movie that's not the worst could be considered "one of the best." Imagine that, another empty phrase used by marketing people. I want to punch someone in the throat."”

“Christine O'Donnell: You know what, evolution is a myth. And even Darwin himself—
Bill Maher: Evolution is a myth? Have you ever looked at a monkey?
Christine O'Donnell: Well then, why aren't they — why aren't monkeys still evolving into humans?”