“America is a vast conspiracy to make you happy.”

Paul Bunyan

Source: A Woman's Thoughts About Women (1858), Ch. 10

Source: Ouran High School Host Club, Vol. 13

Reacting to the truthful reports that her husband, Bill Clinton, had an affair with White House intern, Monica Lewinsky; Interview with Matt Lauer on NBC's Today show (27 January 1998)
White House years (1993–2000)
Context: From my perspective, this is part of the continuing political campaign against my husband… I mean, look at the very people who are involved in this. They have popped up in other settings. The great story here for anybody willing to find it, write about it and explain it is this vast right-wing conspiracy that has been conspiring against my husband since the day he announced for president.

Source: Nineteen Minutes

When asked if Donald Trump is racist.
Presidential campaign (April 12, 2015 – 2016), Democratic Presidential Debate in Miami (March 9, 2016)
Context: I was the first one to call him out. I called him out when he was calling Mexicans rapists.... His demagoguery, his trafficking in prejudice and paranoia has no place in our political system. Especially from somebody running for president who couldn’t decide whether or not to disavow the and David Duke. So people can draw their own conclusions about him. I will just end by saying this. You don’t make America great by getting rid of everything that made America great. I think it’s un-American. I think what he has promoted is not at all in keeping with American values.

Source: The Three Questions - Prosperity and the Public Good (1998), Chapter Two, The First Question: Self Interest and Prosperity, p. 21

Source: Unsourced