Bill Watterson cytaty

“Calvin: In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
p58”

“You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!”

“I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”

“I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.”

“Childhood is for spoiling adulthood.”

“Reality continues to ruin my life.”

“It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.”

“Calvin: Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we can think faster than we speak?.
Hobbes: Probably so we can think twice.
p.171”

“Calvin: You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help.
p33”

“I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.”

“You can't just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.
What mood is that?
Last-minute panic.”

“I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.”

“The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”

“Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?”

“Calvin: As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.
p25”

“I'm a misunderstood genius."
"What's misunderstood?"
"Nobody thinks I'm a genius.”

“We're so busy watching out for what's just ahead of us that we don't take time to enjoy where we are.”

“Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said 'I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?”

“That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!”

“If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I'll bet they'd live a lot differently.”

“When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.”

“Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.”

“I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.”

“I'm learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework… procrastinating and negotiation.”

“I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.”

“I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.”

“God put me on earth to accomplish certain things. Right now, I’m so far behind, I’ll never die.”

“You know, sometimes the world seems like a pretty mean place.'

'That's why animals are so soft and huggy.”