“I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.”
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Rodney Dangerfield 54
American actor and comedian 1921–2004Related quotes

Quoted in Bob Fenster, Laugh Off: The Comedy Showdown Between Real Life and the Pros (2005), p. 37
Variant: I told my psychiatrist everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous; everyone hasn't met me yet.

"The Haunted Smile: The Story of Jewish Comedians in America" (2001)
“I told her once I wasn’t good at anything. She told me survival is a talent.”
Source: Girl, Interrupted

“I don’t think she told any lies. She just forgot to tell the whole truth.”
Source: Dreams of Steel (1990), Chapter 10 (p. 263)

Never Seek to Tell
1790s, Poems from Blake's Notebook (c. 1791-1792)