“The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”

“Let woman out of the home, let man into it, should be the aim of education. The home needs man, and the world outside needs woman.”

“I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.”

“If I couldn't do it my way, I'd best stay at home.”

“Home is where the heart is, home is where the fart is.
Come let us fart in the home.
There is no art in a fart.
Still a fart may not be artless.
Let us fart and artless fart in the home.”

“Relief is a wonderful emotion, highly underrated. In fact, I prefer it to elation or joy. Relief lets the air out of the Tire of Pain.”

“Let the wife make her husband glad to come home and let him make her sorry to see him leave.”

“Stay, stay at home, my heart and rest;
Home-keeping hearts are happiest.”

“that, can be your home now, let me be your home now.”

“The best way to make children good is to make them happy.”