“The British tourist is always happy abroad as long as the natives are waiters.”

“In this instance of the fire-arms, the Asiatic has been most improperly bracketed with the native. The British Indian does not need any such restrictions as are imposed by the Bill on the natives regarding the carrying of fire-arms. The prominent race can remain so by preventing the native from arming himself. Is there a slightest vestige of justification for so preventing the British Indian?”

“You've always been a tourist here. You just didn't know it.”

“I believe that all of us - whether native Scots or our friends abroad - should strive for a shared understand of our heritage and origins.”

“It is not in the bright, happy day, but only in the solemn night, that other worlds are to be seen shining in their long, long distances. And it is in sorrow — the night of the soul — that we see farthest, and know ourselves natives of infinity, and sons and daughters of the Most High.”

“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short.”

“A particular characteristic of Britain is that its natives, when travelling abroad, are more splendid in their dress and manner of living, whence they may be distinguished from all other peoples.”
Proprie uero proprium Britanniae est, ut incolae eius in peregrinationem tendentes, omnibus gentibus cultu et sumptu clariores ex hoc unde sint dinosci possint.’’

“The [Judaic] Patriarchs are depicted as Arameans as long as they remained in their native lands.”

“Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.”

“Well, isn’t Bohemia a place where everyone is as good as everyone else — and must not a waiter be a little less than a waiter to be a good Bohemian?”