“Let's look beyond the divisions of football teams and look at the unifying force within our souls… SEX!”
Big Fat Quiz of the Year (2006)
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Russell Brand 149
British comedian, actor, and author 1975Related quotes

Speech at the ninth World Islamic Economic Forum in 2013 - "World Islamic Economic Forum: Prime Minister's speech" Gov.uk (29 October 2013) https://www.gov.uk/government/speeches/world-islamic-economic-forum-prime-ministers-speech
2010s, 2013

“In football everything is complicated by the presence of the opposite team.”

Ramsey's indignant opinion of Argentina after England beat them 1–0 in a bruising quarter final in the 1966 World Cup. [World Cup medal honour for Sir Alf, http://www.ipswichstar.co.uk/news/world_cup_medal_honour_for_sir_alf_1_173288, 1 April 2012, ipswichstar.co.uk, 26 June 2009]

Prophets and Kings http://www.ccel.org/ccel/white/prophets.html, Ch. 60 http://www.egwtext.whiteestate.org/pk/pk60.html, p. 732
Conflict of the Ages series

2009, Nobel Prize acceptance speech (December 2009)
Context: We do not have to think that human nature is perfect for us to still believe that the human condition can be perfected. We do not have to live in an idealized world to still reach for those ideals that will make it a better place. The non-violence practiced by men like Gandhi and King may not have been practical or possible in every circumstance, but the love that they preached — their fundamental faith in human progress — that must always be the North Star that guides us on our journey.
For if we lose that faith — if we dismiss it as silly or naïve; if we divorce it from the decisions that we make on issues of war and peace — then we lose what's best about humanity. We lose our sense of possibility. We lose our moral compass.
Like generations have before us, we must reject that future. As Dr. King said at this occasion so many years ago, "I refuse to accept despair as the final response to the ambiguities of history. I refuse to accept the idea that the 'isness' of man's present condition makes him morally incapable of reaching up for the eternal 'oughtness' that forever confronts him."
Let us reach for the world that ought to be — that spark of the divine that still stirs within each of our souls.

“Let us look to our Government, Fleet, and Trade.”
Speech in parliament (19 October 1675) http://www.british-history.ac.uk/report.asp?compid=40374.
Context: The King governs by Law. Let us look back to the evils we had, in order to prevent more. There was loan, and ship-money, and extremes begat extremes. The House would then give no money. Let the King rely upon the Parliament; we have settled the Crown and the Government. 'Tis strange that we have sat so many years, and given so much money, and are still called upon for Supply. The Lords may give Supply with their own money, but we give the peoples; we are their proxies. The King takes his measures by the Parliament, and he doubts not but that all the Commons will supply for the Government; but giving at this rate that we have done, we shall be "a branch of the revenue." They will "anticipate" us too. But, let the officers say what they will, we will not make these mismanagements the King's error. 'Tis better it should fall upon us than the King. We give public money, and must see that it goes to public use. Tell your money, fix it to public ends, and take order against occasions of this nature for the future. We cannot live at the expence of Spain, that has the Indies; or France, who has so many millions of revenue. Let us look to our Government, Fleet, and Trade. 'Tis the advice that the oldest Parliament-man among you can give you; and so, God bless you!

“Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace.”
Billy Connolly by Nigel Huddleston, published June 2004.
Book Sources

“By forcing us to look closely at our requests, prayer purifies us.”
Too Busy Not to Pray (2008, InterVarsity Press)