“I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.”

“Oh, torture. Torture. My pubic hairs went gray.”

““I’ve always regretted not having a brother. Maybe I shouldn’t.”
“For me it’s always been like having pubic hair. You have it, but what the hell is it for?””

“I now began to collect pubic hair, which I figured was a much safer way to go. I’d look for pubic hair in every bathroom after the girls showered, and in my mind’s eye, I’d try to match up each hair with each girl, all the while imaging her beautiful, luscious, wet, hairy, good-feeling bush. I mean, this was the summer that our pool area just seemed to be full of girls all the time. I was quickly becoming a pubic hair expert”

“Tasmania is famous for its shape, which is the same shape as the pubic hair region on a woman's body, which I personally don't identify with. Mine's more like a map of the former Soviet Union. Not to scale.”

“The Messenger of Allah said: ‘Ten things are connected to the Fitrah: trimming the moustache, letting the beard grow, using the tooth stick, rinsing out the nostrils with water, clipping the nails, washing the joints, plucking the armpit hairs, shaving the pubic hairs, washing the private parts with water. (One of the narrators) Zakariyya said: Musab said: I have forgotten the tenth thing, but it may have been rinsing out the mouth.”

“The part that wasn't a jackpot was his baseball mound of red pubic hair that looked like it had literally been attached with a glue gun. I couldn't believe how much there was, and wondered how he had never heard of scissors, or--more appropriate for that kind of growth--hedge trimmers. I didn't understand what porn he was watching to not be aware of the trimming that was happening all across the world among his compatriots. I'm not a finicky person when it comes to pubic hair maintenance and I certainly don't expect men to shave it all off, leaving themselves to look like a hairless cat. That's even creepier then than seeing what Austin had, which could really only be compared to one thing: A clown in a leg lock.”

“I think the obsession with my hair is funny. People copy my hair. At meet and greets, people touch my hair. I don’t have any product in it.”

“I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out.”

“Look, I asked you here for a reason. Much as I hate to admit it, vampire, we have something in common."
"Totally awesome hair?" Simon suggested.”