“As long as you're rememberin' baby Jesus, does it matter when you're rememberin' 'im[Karl on how he hates Christmas being the same date each year]”

“Moving stranger,
Does it really matter,
As long as you're not afraid to feel?”

“How does it feel,
When you're alone and you're cold inside?”

“I've never really understood the desire people have to quantify a baby. "He's X big and Y long," As if the baby is a fish you're not sure you're going to keep. Or some prize potato you're hoping will win a prize at the county fair.”

“Well…like, when you're born, you're a little baby, you're wrinkly and stuff, when you get older you sort of morph into a baby again…”

“I took my baby on a Saturday bang,
Boy, is that girl with you?
Yes, we're one and the same.
Well, I believe in miracles,
And a miracle has happened tonight,
But if you're thinking about my baby,
It don't matter if you're black or white.”

“So if the world hates us, we take courage that it hated Jesus first. If you're wondering whether you'll be safe, just look at what they did to Jesus and those who followed him. There are safer ways to live than by being a Christian.”

“I don't understand how people can stand next to you one year, and next year, they cannot. They're going crazy, screaming. They can't take it that you're there. But last year I was in the same club, walking around, lonely. Couldn't get a date or a dance. I was too skinny, too something, and now, "He's just adorable. He's just, oh!”

“Bobby Tom: You're supposed to be my assistant, not a baby-sitter!
Gracie: One and the same.”

“No dates until you're thirty.”