“Daddy? Daddy, I know the baby is in the mommy‟s tummy and the baby comes out of the mommy‟s tummy, but, Daddy? How do that baby get in the mommy‟s tummy?”

“God bless mommy and daddy, and please can we have some candy.”

“Do you even really know how vampires are made?'
'Well, when a mommy vampire and a daddy vampire love each other very much…”

“Daddy, daddy, daddy,
All I want is you.
You can have me, baby —
but my lovin’ days is through.
A certain amount
of impotence
in a dream deferred.”

“She made an impatient noise. "By the Angel, you don't know anything about your kid, do you? Do you even really know how vampires are made?"
"Well, when a mommy vampire and a daddy vampire love each other very much…”

“It was a bitter moment for us. We weren't two mature parents. We were just two kids playing grown-up. We still needed Mommy and Daddy's permission, blessings, and money to survive.”

“Who's your daddy? Who's your baby?
Who's your buddy? Who's your friend?
And who's the one guy that you come runnin' to
When your lovelife starts tumblin'?I got the money if you got the honey
Let's cut a deal, let's make a plan
Who's your daddy? Who's your baby?
Who's your buddy? Who's your man?”

“Dummy, dummy, go out now and fill your tummy.”

“I wear this Saint Christopher medal sometimes because — I'm Jewish — but my boyfriend is Catholic. It was cute, the way he gave it to me. He said if it doesn't burn through my skin, it will protect me. Who cares? Different religions.
The only time it's an issue, I suppose, would be like if you're having a baby and you've got to figure out how you want to raise it. Which still wouldn't be an issue for us, because we'd be … honest, and just say, you know, like, "Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!"”

“America used to live by the motto "Father Knows Best." Now we're lucky if "Father Knows He Has Children." We've become a nation of sperm donors and baby daddies.”