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Ilona Andrews 428
American husband-and-wife novelist duoRelated quotes

“You’re called a holy man,” she said. “I see you’re wholly deranged.”
Source: Fiction, The Book of the New Sun (1980–1983), The Urth of the New Sun (1987), Chapter 36, "The Citadel Again" (p. 255)

“I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.”
Source: Don Quixote de la Mancha (1605–1615), Part II (1615), Book III, Ch. 33.

“Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?”
Cartoon caption, The New Yorker (5 June 1937); "Word Dance--Part One", A Thurber Carnival (1960)
Cartoon captions
Source: Collecting Himself: James Thurber On Writing And Writers, Humor And Himself

"The Dirty Dozen: Charisma Carpenter" http://www.playboy.com/sex/d12/charismacarpenter/02.html, Playboy.com, p. 2 (accessed 2006-04-30)
When asked what was the strangest place she had sex.

“It is wise to be silent when occasion requires, and better than to speak, though never so well.”
Moralia, Of the Training of Children

Edward Young, "Night Thoughts," (1742-1745) Part IX http://www.litgothic.com/Texts/young_night_thoughts.pdf.
Misattributed

“I swear the sparrows called us ten kinds of idiot when we did it.”