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Joseph Heller citations
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Joseph Heller, né à Brooklyn le 1er mai 1923 et mort à East Hampton le 12 décembre 1999, est un auteur américain mondialement connu pour ses écrits satiriques concernant la Seconde Guerre mondiale notamment Catch 22. Wikipedia  

✵ 1. mai 1923 – 12. décembre 1999
Joseph Heller photo
Joseph Heller: 142 citations1 J'aime

Joseph Heller citations célèbres

“Les hommes les plus braves connaissent la peur.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Le souffle vital envolé, l'homme n'est que tripaille.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Les idéaux sont bons, mais les gens le sont parfois un peu moins.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Se défiler devant les problèmes ne les a jamais résolus.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Il faut de l'intelligence pour ne pas gagner d'argent.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Pour l'homme de science, toutes les agonies se valent.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

Joseph Heller Citations

“Certains hommes naissent médiocres, d'autres le deviennent, et à d'autres encore, la médiocrité est imposée.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“L'occasion ne frappe qu'une seule fois à votre porte.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“S'il acceptait de partir, il était fou et devait en être dispensé, mais s'il refusait, c'est qu'il était sain d'esprit et n'avait plus dès lors droit à une dispense.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

“Un mort se fout complètement de qui a gagné la guerre.”

Joseph Heller

, 1961

Joseph Heller: Citations en anglais

“In my middle years, I have exchanged the position of the fetus for the position of a corpse.”

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Joseph Heller livre Something Happened

Something Happened (1974)

“How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

“There was no way of knowing anything, he knew, not even that there was no way of knowing anything.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Source: Catch-22 (1961), pp. 266

“When one is infatuated, faults are endearing that in others would be heinous.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“It was love at first sight. The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in love with him.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Opening Lines
Catch-22 (1961)

“All is vanity, you know, ALL in the long run is but vanity and vexation of spirit.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“Yossarian — the very sight of the name made him shudder. There were so many esses in it. It just had to be subversive. It was like the word subversive itself. It was like seditious and insidious too, and like socialist, suspicious, fascist and Communist.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

“If the chance ever comes to you to fall in love, grab it, every time. You might always live to regret it, but you won't find anything to beat it, and you won't know if it will come to you once more.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“He who steals my purse steals trash, but he that filches from me my good name robs me of that which not enriches him, and makes me poor indeed.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

Shakespeare's Othello said it first.
God Knows (1984)

“I said it again as a German might. "Rabinovitz. Ich bin Lew Rabinowitz, LR, von Coney Island in Brooklyn, New York. Du Kennst?" And then I spoke Yiddish. "Und ich bin ein Yid. Farshtest?" And then in English. "I am a Jew. Understand?" And then in my fractured German. "Ich bin Jude. Verstehst?" Now they didn't know where to look, but they did not want to look at me. I've got blue eyes that can turn into slits of ice, Claire still tells me, and a pale, European skin that can turn red fast when I laugh hard or get mad, and I wasn't sure they believed me.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Source: Catch-22 (1961), pp. 122

“He [God] owes me an apology too- at the very least. I'm not saying I shouldn't have been punished for those sins I committed. I'm saying that the punishments he chose were inhuman. I wonder what favor I'd want. I think I may be afraid to ask for it. I'm afraid He won't grant it. I'm more afraid that He will. Wouldn't it be tragic to find out that He really has been here all this time?”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“Women don't suffer from penis envy. Men do.”

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Joseph Heller livre Something Happened

Something Happened (1974)

“The end result of experiencing terror and injury is not an increase in compassion, but a tendency toward callousness.”

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Joseph Heller

Cited as being from Catch-22 but really from the discussion, for Chapter 26, in CliffsNotes on Heller’s Catch-22 https://www.amazon.com/CliffsNotes-Hellers-Catch-22-Cliffsnotes-Literature-ebook/dp/B00BOE144M. <br class="br">Disputed

“There is wisdom in madness and strong probability of truth in all accusations, for people are complete and everybody is capable of everything”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“He could never decide whether to furgle them or photograph them, for he had found it impossible to do both simultaneously.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Source: Catch-22 (1961), pp.53-54. Dell 1962 edition. (First use of "furgle" in the United States.)

“But I make a profit of three and a quarter cents an egg by selling them for four and a quarter cents an egg to the people in Malta I buy them from for seven cents an egg. Of course, I don't make the profit. The syndicate makes the profit. And everybody has a share.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

“Outside the hospital the war was still going on. Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

“The problem with the loneliness I suffer is that the company of others has never been a cure for it.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“God is a murderer, imagine that. I told you I had the best story in the Bible, didn't I? I have always known that He was. Sooner or later He murders us all, doesn't He, and we go back to the dust from which we came. So I'm no longer scared to defy him. All He can do is kill me.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“God does have this self-serving habit of putting all blame for His own mistakes on other people, doesn't He? He picks someone arbitrarily, unbidden, right out of the blue so to speak, and levies upon them tasks of monumental difficulty for which we don't always measure up in every particular, then charges US for HIS error in selecting imperfectly. He tends to forget that we are no more infallible than He is.”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as Catch-22 I'm tempted to reply, "Who has?"”

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Joseph Heller

As quoted in The Oxford Dictionary of Literary Quotations (1997) edited by Peter Kemp, p. 303

“I imagine that God Himself frequently wants to feel like a king. Why else would He create the world?”

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Joseph Heller livre God Knows

God Knows (1984)

“"Let someone else get killed!" "Suppose everyone on our side felt that way?" "Well then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?"”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

“The yellow moon turned orange and was soon red as the setting sun.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Source: Catch-22 (1961), pp. 462

“Catch-22 says they have a right to do anything we can't stop them from doing.”

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Joseph Heller livre Catch-22

Catch-22 (1961)

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