Woody Allen: Trending quotes (page 5)

“Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.”

“Harry: Tradition is the illusion of permanence.”

“Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?”

“Love is too weak a word for what I feel - I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F's, yes.”

“The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty.”

“There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?”

“Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad. Sun, milk, red meat… college”

“I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier.”

“I am at two with nature.”

“Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.”

“When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.”

“There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?”

“Can we actually "know" the universe? My God, it's hard enough finding your way around in Chinatown.”

“The wicked at heart probably know something.”

“I can't fight.
I was once run over by a car with a flat tire, being pushed by two guys.”

“Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!”

“Living is messy.”

“Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK?
It'll be a year come April 20th.
I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday”

“We Are The Sum Total Of Our Choices…”