Terry Pratchett: Trending quotes (page 29)

“The worst thing you can do is nothing.”

“The trouble was that he was talking in philosophy but they were listening in gibberish.”

“William: "I'm sure we can all pull together, sir."
Vetinari: "Oh, I do hope not. Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions.”

“I’m not superstitious. I’m a witch. Witches aren’t superstitious. We are what people are superstitious of.”

“And just when you’d think [humans] were more malignant than ever Hell could be, they occasionally showed more grace than Heaven ever dreamed of.”

“It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny.”

“Things that try to look like things often do look more like things than things.”

“A weapon you held and didn't know how to use belonged to your enemy.”

“I was merely endeavoring to indicate that if we do not grab events by the collar they will have us by the throat.
-Lord Vetinari”

“The turtle moves.”

“We are here and it is now. The way I see it is, after that, everything tends towards guesswork.”

“Shadwell hated all southerners and, by inference, was standing at the North Pole.”

“There's no such thing as writer's block. That was invented by people in California who couldn't write.”

“The phrase 'Someone ought to do something' was not, by itself, a helpful one. People who used itadded the rider 'and that someone is me'.”

“An Assassin, a real Assassin, had to look like one - black clothes, hood, boots, and all. If they could wear any clothes, any disguise, then what could anyone do but spend all day in a small room with a loaded crossbow pointed at the door?”

“THAT’S MORTALS FOR YOU, Death continued. THEY’VE ONLY GOT A FEW YEARS IN THIS WORLD AND THEY SPEND THEM ALL IN MAKING THINGS COMPLICATED FOR THEMSELVES. FASCINATING.”

“Hello, inner child, I'm the inner babysitter!”

“It was quite impossible to describe.

Here is what it looked like.

It looked like a piano sounds shortly after being dropped down a well. It tasted yellow, and it felt Paisley. It smelled like the total eclipse of the moon.”

“Listen, Peaches, is what humans are all about," said the voice of Maurice. "They're so keen on tricking one another all the time that they elect governments to do it for them.”