David Sedaris: Thing

David Sedaris is American author. Explore interesting quotes on thing.

David Sedaris: 216 quotes0 likes

“I find it ridiculous to assign a gender to an inanimate object incapable of disrobing and making an occasional fool of itself. Why refer to lady crack pipe or good sir dishrag when these things could never live up to all that their sex implied?”

David Sedaris book Me Talk Pretty One Day

Source: Me Talk Pretty One Day

“I love things made out of animals. It's just so funny to think of someone saying, "I need a letter opener. I guess I'll have to kill a deer.”

Interview with Robert David Sullivan
Context: "I love things made out of animals," Sedaris says, holding a knife with a hoof for a handle. "It's just so funny to think of someone saying, 'I need a letter opener. I guess I'll have to kill a deer.'"

“Weird doors open. People fall into things.”

“Being locked up is one thing, but to have no concept of confinement, to be ignorant of its terms and never understand that struggle is useless - that's what hell must be like.”

“It is funny the things that run through your mind when you're sitting in your underpants in front of a pair of strangers.”

David Sedaris When You Are Engulfed in Flames

Source: When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.”

David Sedaris When You Are Engulfed in Flames

Source: When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“College is the best thing that can ever happen to you," my father used to say, and he was right, for it was there that I discovered drugs, drinking, and smoking..”

David Sedaris Naked

Source: Naked

“In other parts of the country people tried to stay together for the sake of the children. In New York they tried to work things out for the sake of the apartment.”

David Sedaris book Me Talk Pretty One Day

Source: Me Talk Pretty One Day (2000)

“Remember that the most important thing is to try and love other people as much as they love you.”

David Sedaris book Holidays on Ice

Source: Holidays on Ice

“After a few months in my parents' basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of the these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations.”

David Sedaris book Me Talk Pretty One Day

Me Talk Pretty One Day (2000)

“on genders of nouns: Why refer to Lady Crack Pipe or Good Sir Dishrag when these things could never live up to all that their sex implied?”

David Sedaris book Me Talk Pretty One Day

Me Talk Pretty One Day (2000)

“After coming home, I listened to the radio and cleaned up a little. A woman on All Things Considered wrote a book of advice called If You Want to Write and mentioned the importance of keeping a diary. It was valuable, she said, because after a while you'd stop being forced and pretentious and become honest and unafraid of your thoughts.”

01.07.1983 - p.94
Theft by Finding: Diaries, Volume 1 (1977-2002) (2017)

“Another old-fashioned practice I maintain is carrying a notebook, a small one I keep in my shirt pocket and never leave the house without. In it I register all the little things that strike me, not in great detail but just quickly. The following morning I'll review what I jotted down and look for the most meaningful moment in the previous day, the one in which I felt truly present.
It's worth mentioning that this is my edit. It wasn't easy revisiting what are now 156 volumes of my diary.”

"Introduction". p.6, 7 [Page numbers per the 2017 Little, Brown hardback UK edition.]
Theft by Finding: Diaries, Volume 1 (1977-2002) (2017)

“Because I was lazy, I'd adopted the philosophy that things just happen.”

David Sedaris Naked

Essay: "C.O.G." (p.222)
Naked (1997)

“I can't seem to fathom that the things important to me are not important to other people as well, and so I come off sounding like a missionary, someone whose job it is to convert rather than listen.”

David Sedaris book Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

Essay: "Put a lid on it" - p.203
Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim (2004)