Bill Maher: Quotes about people

Bill Maher is American stand-up comedian. Explore interesting quotes on people.
Bill Maher: 282   quotes 4   likes

“I have a theory that the Internet makes people stupider — and also FOX News makes people stupider.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)
Context: I have a theory that the Internet makes people stupider — and also FOX News makes people stupider. You know the Pew group did a study recently and they found out that 10 years ago, Democrats, Republicans and independents basically got their news from the same sources, probably more from CNN, for example. Then we had this polarity. … We do have two Americas. We have the America that's living in reality. The people who understand that Obama is a centrist liberal from Hawaii who is trying to dig us out of the hole we're in. And then we have this other FOX/Matt Drudge/Rush Limbaugh reality where he is a Muslim sleeper cell, Manchurian candidate who was sent over by his Kenyan father …

People , Stupidity

“Mr. President, there are some people who are never going to like you.”

Bill Maher

New Rule: Float Like Obama, Sting Like Ali (2009)
Context: Mr. President, there are some people who are never going to like you. That's why they voted for the old guy and Carrie's mom. You're not going to win them over. Stand up for the 70% of Americans who aren't crazy.

People

“The sad fact about the mosque is the people who are building that mosque are part of the Sufi fringe moderate part of their religion. That's the good part. That's the liberal part. Those are the Hippies of the Islamic world.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)
Context: The sad fact about the mosque is the people who are building that mosque are part of the Sufi fringe moderate part of their religion. That's the good part. That's the liberal part. Those are the Hippies of the Islamic world. We should encourage them. The people who want to build that mosque, those are the people we should be courting. Bush used that guy. Bush — that administration sent him overseas. Yes, that's the way to fight terrorism. That's the way to win the war, is to get those people on our side, not to alienate them. … I mean, the biggest population of Muslims in the world is Indonesia. They're not crazy. The second biggest is India. There's 150 million Muslims in India. They're not crazy. …But Saudi Arabia, they're crazy. The Taliban in Afghanistan, they're crazy. Parts of Pakistan are crazy. Hamas is crazy. There's enough of them to worry about.

People , World , Sadness , Religion

“The country can't get well if the people are sick. And the people are sick.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)
Context: The country can't get well if the people are sick. And the people are sick. Now, I know Obama's not been the best president and the Democrats are not the best politicians, but you know what? We elected him just two years ago to fix this massive bunch of problems we have. And because he didn't do it by football season, we are ready to throw him out on the street and bring back the guys who messed it up just two years ago. That's a little too impatient. Yes, when he got the patient, the patient was bleeding to death — he got the patient to stop bleeding. But, OK, the patient is not up and back at the office quite yet. It's no reason to throw the doctor out and get back the doctor who was using leaches.

People , Country

“You can't give that to people to pass around and smudge up with their grimy fingers. But it didn't matter, because it never matters to these people because nothing they say is ever fact-checked.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)
Context: That's the problem with the Drudge-Rush-Fox axis-of-evil news bubble. Nothing gets into these people's heads. They only listen to what they want to hear. They listen to what confirms what they believe. And what they believe is what they got from these people to begin with.
You know, when Glenn Beck had his big rally on the mall, he said something like — he at one point said, "Today, I was holding George Washington's inaugural in my hand." No — you can't do that — it's in Plexiglas. You can't — it's 200 years old. You can't give that to people to pass around and smudge up with their grimy fingers. But it didn't matter, because it never matters to these people because nothing they say is ever fact-checked. The governor of Arizona talks about how illegals — you saw this on the news — were beheading people in Arizona. When the press asked her about it, because it was patently untrue, she just ran away. Sarah Palin never talks to the press because they might ask her a question that she doesn't have a pat answer for. They know they don't have to deal with reality, because they don't have to go to what used to be the mainstream press.

People

“That's the problem with the Drudge-Rush-Fox axis-of-evil news bubble. Nothing gets into these people's heads. They only listen to what they want to hear. They listen to what confirms what they believe.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)
Context: That's the problem with the Drudge-Rush-Fox axis-of-evil news bubble. Nothing gets into these people's heads. They only listen to what they want to hear. They listen to what confirms what they believe. And what they believe is what they got from these people to begin with.
You know, when Glenn Beck had his big rally on the mall, he said something like — he at one point said, "Today, I was holding George Washington's inaugural in my hand." No — you can't do that — it's in Plexiglas. You can't — it's 200 years old. You can't give that to people to pass around and smudge up with their grimy fingers. But it didn't matter, because it never matters to these people because nothing they say is ever fact-checked. The governor of Arizona talks about how illegals — you saw this on the news — were beheading people in Arizona. When the press asked her about it, because it was patently untrue, she just ran away. Sarah Palin never talks to the press because they might ask her a question that she doesn't have a pat answer for. They know they don't have to deal with reality, because they don't have to go to what used to be the mainstream press.

People , Problem , Evil

“The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.”

Bill Maher

The Decider (21 July 2007)

People , Idea , Problem

“Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake — you know, to send the right message to kids.”

Bill Maher book New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer

"Valentine's Day, that great state holiday" in The Boston Globe (14 February 2004) http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2004/02/14/valentines_day_that_great_state_holiday
Source: New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer

People , Law , Birthday

“We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels & free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep & conformists.”

Bill Maher
People , Country

“The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.”

Bill Maher
People , Stupidity , Evil

“… even scarier is why people have stopped thinking global warming is real. One major reason, pollsters say, is, "we had a very cold, snowy winter". Which is like saying the sun might not be real because last night it got dark.”

Bill Maher

Episode 187, "New Rules" segment http://www.hbo.com/real-time-with-bill-maher/index.html#/real-time-with-bill-maher/episodes/0/187-episode/article/new-rules.html, June 4, 2010
Real Time with Bill Maher

People , Thinking , Winter , Sun

“We're going to get into partisan bickering because more than half of Republicans agreed with the statement that said Obama is trying to impose Islamic law on America. I mean that is a very radical thing to believe. And it's more than half of Republicans. Not tea baggers. Not radicals. The mainstream Republican people.”

Bill Maher

Larry King Live interview (2010)

People , Law , Tea

“It's very sad how in the information age you cannot get information into people's heads. As long as you write something on the internet and do not add LOL — it is true. "I'm not sure he's a Christian" — I'm not sure he's a mammal, Jay. He could be a werewolf.”

Bill Maher

Source: Interview on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (13 September 2010)

People , Age , Sadness

“You know, if you're an American and you're born at this time in history especially, you're lucky. We all are. We won the world history Powerball lottery, but a little modesty about it might keep the heat off of us. I can't stand the people who say things like, "We built this country!" You built nothing. I think the railroads were pretty much up by 1980.”

Bill Maher

Victory Begins at Home (20 January 2004)

People , World , History , Thinking

“You've got to give it up for our troops. The mission itself is hard enough, but then there's all sorts of backdoor drafts where they extend their tours, calling up the guard, the reserve; all these Enron accounting tricks so that Rumsfeld doesn't have to admit he got the troop levels wrong, and still they don't bug out. And I see this, and then I watch some reality show, and I see people who are peevish and selfish and greedy and narcissistic and lazy and stupid, and I think to myself, "Why is this first group of people defending this second group of people?"”

Bill Maher

I'm Swiss (2005)

People , Stupidity , Thinking , Reality

“Jesus is great — is there a better role model? No. It's religion, it's the people who get in between — the bureaucracy, you know. … It's the way people abuse Jesus. Was there ever a greater victim of name dropping?”

Bill Maher

Be More Cynical (2000) - YouTube clip "Bill Maher on Jesus" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4WMBzived0
Variants: I love Jesus. I just don’t like the Christians who don’t believe in what he says.
Realtime (7 October 2005) http://www.billmaher.com/?page_id=145
Jesus, as a philosopher is wonderful. There's no greater role model, in my view, than Jesus Christ. It's just a shame that most of the people who follow him and call themselves Christians act nothing like him.
Interviewed on The O'Reilly Factor (26 September 2006) - YouTube clip "Fox's O'Reilly: Bill Maher Looks Bigoted Not John Rocker?" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2555oNAMcfA

People , Religion , Way

“There’s only one faith, for example, that kills you or wants to kill you if you draw a bad cartoon of the prophet. There’s only one faith that kills you or wants to kill you if you renounce the faith… obviously, most Muslim people are not terrorists. But ask most Muslim people in the world, if you insult the prophet, do you have what’s coming to you? It’s more than just a fringe element.”

Bill Maher

Bill Maher: Jeff Poor, "Bill Maher: Comparing violence of Islam to Christianity ‘liberal bullsh*t’ [VIDEO"], The Daily Caller, April 20, 2013 (archived).

People , World , Faith , Drawing

“Muslims still take their religion too seriously, whereas we have the good sense to blow it off. Catholics don’t follow the Pope. In overwhelming numbers they divorce, they have pre-marital sex, they masturbate. And unlike the Koran, no one here seriously considers following the Bible literally. Guys don't look over their fence on Sunday morning and see a neighbor mowing the lawn and think, "Working on Sunday? I really should kill him."… But, before I conclude, it should in fairness be noted that, in speaking of Muslims, we realize that of course the vast majority are law-abiding, loving people who just want to be left alone to subjugate their women in peace.”

Bill Maher

"The South Park Mohammad controversy" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUEaMA4gRIk
Real Time with Bill Maher

Love , Women , People , Peace

“I want to thank some very special people without whom I would not be here today. George Bush, Sarah Palin and the Pope. When I came to Hollywood in 1983, I had one dream— to sleep with Jodie Foster. That didn't work out, but this is nice, too.”

Bill Maher

On getting his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame (14 September 2010), as reported on Larry King Live (14 September 2010)

People , Dreams , Sleep