Quotes from book

Monstrous Regiment

“The four lesser apocalyptical horsemen of Panic, Bewilderment, Ignorance, and Shouting took control of the room”

“[The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners.”

“You take a bunch of people who don't seem any different from you and me, but when you add them all together you get this sort of huge raving maniac with national borders and an anthem.”

“Good or bad, do it as you. Too many lies and there's no truth to go back to.”

“It's lies. It's all lies. Some of them are just prettier than others, that's all. People see what they think is there.”

“It's not lying when you do it to officers!”

“I don't want unnecessary violence, sergeant," said Blouse.
"Right you are, sir!" said the sergeant. "Carborundum! First man comes through that door runnin', I want him nailed to the wall!" He caught the lieutenant's eye, and added: "But not too hard!”

“Who shall I shoot? You choose. Now, listen very carefully: where's your coffee? You've got coffee, haven't you? C'mon, everyone's got coffee! Spill the beans!”

“This was not a fairy-tale castle and there was no such thing as a fairy-tale ending, but sometimes you could threaten to kick the handsome prince in the ham-and-eggs.”

“The purpose of this lectchoor is to let you know where we are. We are in the deep cack. It couldn't be worse if it was raining arseholes. Any questions?”

“There was this about vampires : they could never look scruffy. Instead, they were… what was the word… deshabille. It meant untidy, but with bags and bags of style.”

“The enemy isn't men, or women, it's bloody stupid people and no one has the right to be stupid.”

“Do you think it's possible for an entire nation to be insane?”

“The presence of those seeking the truth is infinitely to be preferred to the presence of those who think they've found it.”