Quotes about asparagus

A collection of quotes on the topic of asparagus, eating, likeness, man.

Quotes about asparagus

“Playwrights are like men who have been dining for a month in an Indian restaurant. After eating curry night after night, they deny the existence of asparagus.”

Peter Ustinov (1921–2004) English actor, writer, and dramatist

As quoted in Contemporary Quotations (1988) by James Beasley Simpson

“What is that smell? (Nick)
(It was like three-day-old cat vomit mixed with rotten asparagus.)
Duck urine. It keeps the zombies from thinking I’m human. (Mark)
Yeah, well it keeps me from thinking you’re sane. (Nick)”

Sherrilyn Kenyon (1965) Novelist

Source: Infinity

“Bradbury Fisher shuddered from head to foot, and his legs wobbled like asparagus stalks.”

P.G. Wodehouse (1881–1975) English author

The Heart of a Goof (1926)

“I revere the memory of Mr. F. as an estimable man and most indulgent husband, only necessary to mention Asparagus and it appeared or to hint at any little delicate thing to drink and it came like magic in a pint bottle; it was not ecstasy but it was comfort.”

Charles Dickens book Little Dorrit

Bk. I, Ch. 24
Little Dorrit (1855-1857)

Drink, Appearance, Memory

“Have you ever seen Spode eat asparagus?'
'No.'
'Revolting. It alters one's whole conception of Man as Nature's last word.”

P.G. Wodehouse book The Code of the Woosters

The Code of the Woosters (1938)

“Eggs and asparagus are helpful as far as diet is concerned. I am obviously not suggesting a whole diet of eggs and asparagus. These plus fish oils are beneficial, however, but not when taken with acid foods.”

Jane Roberts (1929–1984) American Writer

Source: Seth, Dreams & Projections of Consciousness, (1986), p. 345-346, quoting from Session 274

Food, Fish, Help

“You needn't tell me that a man who doesn't love oysters and asparagus and good wines has got a soul, or a stomach either. He's simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.”

Saki The Chronicles of Clovis

"The Match-Maker"
The Chronicles of Clovis (1911)

Love, Soul, Wine

“Beginning with a critique of my own limbs, which she said, justly enough, were nothing to write home about, this girl went on to dissect my manners, morals, intellect, general physique, and method of eating asparagus with such acerbity that by the time she had finished the best you could say of Bertram was that, so far as was known, he had never actually committed murder or set fire to an orphan asylum.”

P.G. Wodehouse book Right Ho, Jeeves

Right Ho, Jeeves (1934)

Home, Girl, Time

“We regarded opium as a godsend. It did not develop into an illicit trade, though. There was no legal prohibition, no police running around trying to suppress drugs, driving up the price artificially, and no marketing system. There were no distant markets to send it to because shipping anything was slow at best and often unreliable, and travel was something you just didn't do anymore. Anybody could grow their own poppies or buy raw opium paste from one of the growers. Farmers made more money growing raspberries or asparagus. They grew poppies as a public service. A few people took to smoking opium, but those with an extremely apathetic attitude toward survival tended not to last long in the new disposition of things.”

James Howard Kunstler book World Made By Hand

Source: World Made By Hand (2008), Chapter 5, p. 30

Money, People, Travel, Distant

“It was a yellow voice, a high, shrill treble in the nursery
White always and high, I remember it so,
White cupboard, off-white table, mugs, dolls’ faces
And I was four or five. The garden could have been
Miles away. We were taken down to the green
Asparagus beds, the cut lawn, and the smell of it
Comes each summer after rain when white returns. Our bird,
A canary called Peter, sang behind bars. The black and white cat
Curled and snoozed by the fire and danger was far away.”

Elizabeth Jennings (1926–2001) poet

" A Bird in the House" in Collected Poems (Carcanet, 1987)

Cats, Bird, Summer

“After I eat asparagus…”

Mel Brooks (1926) American director, writer, actor, and producer

The 2,000 Year Old Man (and sequels)