“Well, you know these immigrants, they come to our country, they burden our tax system. What they do is they come here and get into our education system and our health care and I gotta pay the taxes. My taxes have to pay that. Well what the fuck are you doing to me every time you have a kid? Every time you have a kid because its American I should pull up a chaise lounge and wave a flag while 15 of those things come out of you? Oh, I can’t wait to pay for these! They’re American! I have a vasectomy and an abortion on my record, but I can’t wait to pay for your fucking fat-headed mid-western kids. Love it! I’ll take a second job.”

— Doug Stanhope

No Refunds (2007)

Adopted from Wikiquote. Last update June 3, 2021. History

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Doug Stanhope 28

American stand-up comedian, actor, and author 1967

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