“If I am right, then (religious fundamentalists) will not go to Heaven, because there is no Heaven. If they are right, then they will not go to Heaven, because they are hypocrites.”
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Isaac Asimov 303
American writer and professor of biochemistry at Boston Uni… 1920–1992Related quotes

“Good boys will go to heaven,
but bad boys will bring you to heaven.”
Source: https://www.instagram.com/p/CdKuXqVOzcJ/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Source: exclusive interview with kian barazandeh https://starworldmagazine.com/exclusive-interview-with-kian-barazandeh/ Article Published on May 12, 2022
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speaking to an NRA group
[Huckabee, Fluent in the NRA’s Language, Jim, Geraghty, 2007-09-21, National Review, http://www.nationalreview.com/campaign-spot/11849/huckabee-fluent-nras-language, 2011-03-01]

“If there's no bacon in heaven, I don't plan on going.”
Source: <i>Bourbon & Bacon</i> (2014), p. 180

“Go to heaven for the climate, hell for the company.”
https://quoteinvestigator.com/2011/07/19/heaven-for-climate/

“I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there”
No known source in Oscar Wilde's works. Earliest known example of a similar quote comes from a 2001 usenet post https://groups.google.com/forum/message/raw?msg=alt.atheism/ZadPWBw-wew/G_3tx370wpoJ (not attributed to Wilde)
Attributed to Wilde on Goodreads https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/15736-i-don-t-want-to-go-to-heaven-none-of-my?page=83 some time on or before January 2008.
Bears some resemblance to Machiavelli's deathbed dream https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Niccol%C3%B2_Machiavelli#Disputed.
Disputed

“The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.”