“I can’t tell you. I would say that if I did, I would have to kill you, but that wouldn’t be polite.”

“I keep hoping you’ll tell me. You’re the god, after all. If I prayed to you for guidance, and you decided to answer, what would you tell me?”
“I wouldn’t answer.”
“Because you don’t care? Or because you wouldn’t know what to say?”

“How can I tell you that I love you, I love you
But I can’t think of right words to say.”

“Hey, Neil, a reporter asked me would I appoint a Muslim to my administration. I did say no, and here's why. The reporter didn't tell you this. I would have to have people totally committed to the Declaration and the Constitution of the United States and the laws of this country.”

“I love you, you see… and I fear I have no way to say or show it that isn't terrible, except coming here. I would kill everyone in the world for you, if you wanted……. Or not obviously”

“I have a really interesting political point of view, and it’s not always something I say too loud at dinner tables here, but you can’t go from a $2,000-a-night suite at La Mirage to a penitentiary and really understand it and come out a liberal. You can’t. I wouldn’t wish that experience on anyone else, but it was very, very, very educational for me and has informed my proclivities and politics ever since.”

“Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?”

“I mean, the computer industry promises nothing. Did you ever read a shrink-wrapped license agreement? You should read one. It basically says, if this product deliberately kills your children, and we knew it would, and we decided not to tell you because it might harm sales, we're not liable. I mean, it says stuff like that. They're absurd documents. You have no rights.”

“If I could tell you something, I would tell you it all”

“I was in analysis. I was suicidal. As a matter of fact, I would have killed myself, but I was in analysis with a strict Freudian and if you kill yourself they make you pay for the sessions you miss.”