“Is this about you and Hassan? I know there's something going on between you two, but whatever it is, you have to deal with it, not me. I'm staying out of it.”

“Here, I'll practice on you. Mom. I have something to tell you. I'm undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I'm here to tell you that the undead are just like you and me. Well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.”

“Hassan's not going anywhere. He's staying right here with us, where he belongs. This is his home and we're his family. Don't you ever ask me that question again!”

“I'm 82 years old, wherever I go everybody knows me, but here's why… I'm a merchandiser, I'm not just a writer, I stay in every avenue you can think of.”

“It doesn't hurt me.
Do you want to feel how it feels?
Do you want to know that it doesn't hurt me?
Do you want to hear about the deal that I'm making?
You, it's you and me.”

“I am Archie Costello," he said. "And I'll always be there, Obie. You'll always have me wherever you go and whatever you do. Tomorrow, ten years from now. Know why, Obie? Because I'm you. I'm all the things you hide inside you. That's me-" "Cut it out," Obie said. He hated it when Archie began to get fancy, spinning his wheels. "What you're saying is a lot of crap. I know who you are. And I know who I am.”

“Excuse me I'm sorry to bother you,
But don't I know you?
There's just something about you.
Haven't we met before? We've been in love forever.”

“Hey girl I want you to know
I'm gonna miss you so much if you go.
And hey girl I tell you no lie,
Something deep inside of me's going to die
If you say so long, if this is goodbye.”

“And you have stayed, A mile away from me, And you will stay a mile away from me. If you know what’s good for you, You could have stayed until June. ~ "June"”

“For God's sake, all of you, say spiteful things about me, then I shall know I mean something to you. Don't say surgaries, or I'm done.”