“In this Age, when it is said of a Man, He knows how to live, it may be imply’d he is not very honest.”

“However roguish a man may be, he always loves to deal with an honest man.”

“If a man doesn't know how to dance he doesn't know how to make love, there I said it!”

“A man in the jungle at night, as someone said, may suppose a hyena's growl to be a lion's; but when he hears the lion's growl, he knows damn well it's a lion.”

“Life becomes the way it is lived; and man may live the way he wants to live when he learns to think what he wants to think.”

“Carlyle said "a lie cannot live." It shows that he did not know how to tell them. If I had taken out a life policy on this one the premiums would have bankrupted me ages ago.”

“A man who knows how little he knows is well, a man who knows how much he knows is sick.”

“There's one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he's crooked.”

“There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says "yes" you know he is a crook.”

“I don't know if there is a gene for comedy, but my dad was a very funny man. … He just didn't know it. He was a naturally funny character, and when my brother and I would laugh at things he said and did, he would say, 'What do you think is so funny?”