“7 min or less - ur not late, 7-10 "sorry", 10-20 "SO sorry!", 20-30 "i am truly ashamed", over 30 min late - fake ur own death”

“I had been in the ditch for 2 and a half min. I wondered if my friends missed me.”

“Yes mam. I'm sorry you've had such troubles.
Mm-hmm. Sorry. Don’t need sorry. Not in this house. Sorry laid the hearth here. Sorry ways and sorry people and heavensent grief and heartache to make you pine for your death.”

“Yet if heretics be altogether uprooted by death, this is not contrary to Our Lord's command [in Matthew 13:30], which is to be understood as referring to the case when the cockle [weeds] cannot be plucked up without plucking up the wheat, as we explained above (10, 8, ad 1), when treating of unbelievers in general.”

“Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to min'?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days o' auld lang syne?”

“Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to min?'
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days o' auld lang syne?”

“I could shove this swizzle stick through his heart, Min thought. She would'nt do it, of course. The stick was plastic and not nearly pointed enough on the end.”

“Your cat just got cat hair on me.” “It’s only fair,” Min said. “Your suit just got expensive suit lint on him.”

“OH, THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING IN THE STOCKING THAT MAKES A NOISE, said Death. OTHERWISE, WHAT IS 4:30 A. M. FOR?”

“30 AD: Death penalty debate heats up after controversial execution of alleged "Son of God."”