“Lois: [intercepting a man in the women's bookstore] Can I help you find something, sir?
Man: Um… just browsing.
Lois: Hmm… I find that publication rather tame myself. Have you ever seen this one? This month there's a hot photo spread of three totally tattooed babes with strap-ons doing an armpit shaving scene. And if you're looking for a real thrill, check out the story, "She Came in Waves," in this new female ejaculation anthology!
Man: 'Scuse me, I think I left my car at a hydrant.”

— Alison Bechdel, book Dykes to Watch Out For

#155, "Cultural Exchange" (1993), collected in Spawn of DTWOF (1993).
Dykes to Watch Out For

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Alison Bechdel58

American cartoonist, author 1960

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“Lois: Hey, Ginger! Are you masturbating in there or what? I wanna show you something!
Ginger: [in the tub] If I'm masturbating, will you leave me alone?
Lois: No! Check it out. How do I look?
Ginger: Like a white girl in a black bra.”

Alison Bechdel book Dykes to Watch Out For

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“Lois: Good coffee, huh?
Emma: Lois, I think you're a very attractive woman and I'd like to sleep with you.
Lois: [chokes] Gak! Ahem! You don't - coff - fool around, do you?
Emma: No, but I'd like to.”

Alison Bechdel book Dykes to Watch Out For

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“Ginger: I can't do this, Lois! I can't go out with a woman who has a child! I'm too young, I tell you! I haven't sown my oats yet!
Lois: I think your oats are impacted.”

Alison Bechdel book Dykes to Watch Out For

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“You know, I would date, if I could find a man worth shaving my legs for. (Grace)”

Sherrilyn Kenyon Fantasy Lover

Source: Fantasy Lover

“Jordan Elliot: What's for dinner?
Lois Lane: Pizza. After that, if Jonathan's quiet, I thought maybe bed with a bottle of wine. And after that, I figure we just live happily ever after. Sound good to you?
Jordan: Lois, my love… [turns and winks to the reader as he closes the door] What do you think?”

Alan Moore (1953) English writer primarily known for his work in comic books

Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow? (1986)

“And then I realized I was being checked out by GUYS! And I know they were checking me out, because they were looking at me like I look at tacos. And I thought to myself, "Oh my god, I can turn on a man! [Grins and struts] Shoot!" And I called my girlfriend, and I said, "Baby, you better not mess this up; I have options!"”

Gabriel Iglesias (1976) American actor

I'm Not Fat, I'm Fluffy (2009)

“Women have two orgasms, the real ones and the ones they make up on their own. And I can give you the male point of view on this, which is: we're fine with it. You do whatever you have to do, and we'll do whatever we have to…. To a man, sex is like a car accident anyway, and trying to determine a female orgasm is like asking, "What did you see after the car went out of control?" "Well, there were a lot of screeching noises, I was facing the wrong way at one point, and in the end, my body was thrown clear."”

Jerry Seinfeld (1954) American comedian and actor

I'm Telling You for the Last Time (1998)

“You know, I would date if I could find a man worth shaving my legs for. But most are such a waste of time that I’d rather sit at home and watch reruns of Hee Haw.”

Sherrilyn Kenyon Fantasy Lover

Source: Fantasy Lover

“One of my many favorite tattoos I’ve seen of myself is from a photo shoot I did for the cover of a compilation called Punk Fiction that came out in the 90s. And my friend who was putting it together asked me to re-create the movie poster for Pulp Fiction with me in place of Uma Thurman as Mia Wallace on the bed smoking a cigarette with the wig on and everything. So I went in and did that and it was the cover of the record and posters were made. Since then I’ve seen a portrait tattoo of me as Mia Wallace. That’s my favorite. And that was years before I was publicly dressing as a woman, which I’ve been doing for years now onstage and off. I think Mia Wallace was just one of my earlier excuses to strut around in women’s clothing.”

Davey Havok (1975) American singer

http://web.archive.org/web/20101014172908/http://rocknrolltales.com/read/afi

“I think sir, since you care for the advice of an old man, sir, you will find it a very good practise, always to verify your references, sir!”

Martin Joseph Routh (1755–1854) Classical scholar and college head

Advice given to Dean John William Burgon, (29 November 1847), in response to the question: "Every studious man, in the course of a long and thoughtful life, has had occasion to experience the special value of some one axiom or precept. Would you mind giving me the benefit of such a word of advice?"; quoted in Lives of twelve good men, by John William Burgon, 1888, vol. 1 p. 73.

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Alison Bechdel58

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