“(Sylvia at typewriter) "Superwoman." The definition is 1. A woman who has supernatural powers and uses them to fight evil. 2. A woman who has supernatural powers and uses them to combine a family and a career.”

“If a woman with property needs the ballot, a woman who has nothing but her labor power needs two ballots.”

“Nearly unlimited supernatural power, and all you do is use it to watch reruns. What a waste.”

“(Woman at typewriter) Dear Syl,... Is nothing forever? (Sylvia) Red wine on a white couch.”

“A happy woman is one who has no cares at all; a cheerful woman is one who has cares but doesn't let them get her down.”

“(Sylvia at typewriter) What is Newt Gingrich's Real Name? 1) Newton Minnow 2) Fig Newton 3) Isaac Newton 4) Wayne Newton”

“(Sylvia at typewriter) The best place to discuss your sexual dissatisfaction with your partner is 1) in the bedroom 2) in a car, traveling at high speed 3) in a crowded elevator.”

“(Sylvia at typewriter) On Getting Old in America. By Sylvia. Page One. 1. Best to do it somewhere else.”

“(Cartoon title) Don't throw that old diaphragm away! (Sylvia at typewriter) Because it can be used as: 1. Doorknob cover (no need to worry about fingerprints ever again) 2. Bathtub stopper 3) Rainhat for cat 4. Small frisbee.”

“Evil indeed is the man who has not one woman to mourn him.”