“Watching George Romney run for the presidency was like watching a duck try to make love to a football.”

“Seeing John Major govern the country is like watching Edward Scissorhands try to make balloon animals.”

“The president was committed; elected on the basis that he was not Romney and Romney was a poopy head.”

“If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.”

“Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock.”

“She watched me like a prize dog, and Solomon watched her like a criminal.”

“I watched it for a little while, I like to watch things on TV”

“Because watching him love Tiger Lily was better than not watching him at all.”

“Watch your thoughts, for they will become actions. Watch your actions, for they'll become… habits. Watch your habits for they will forge your character. Watch your character, for it will make your destiny.”

“It might have seemed ridiculous to anyone watching, this white-haired maintenance worker, all alone, making like an airplane. But the running boy is inside every man, no matter how old he gets.”