“You can be a mama's boy, be a daddy's boy, but you can't be both. So you cling to the one you think you might lose.”

“Boy, you just can't kill people like you used to”

“When you can't do anything else to a boy, you can make him wash his face.”

“And you can't part a boy from his father,
You can't part a boy from his dad,
You can't part a Scotchman from money
No matter how many he's had.
You can't part the skin of a sausage
Or a dad from his fond son and heir,
And you can't part the hair on a bald-headed man
For there'll be no parting there.”

“My show was so personal, I made it feel like you and I were the only ones there. And I’d say: Boys and girls, come here. Uncle Jack wants to tell you something. You go get Mother or Daddy, Grandmother, Grandfather, whoever is in the house. You go get them, and you make sure they exercise with me.”

“We both believe in monsters. But all the ghosts and demons are you. And all the angels and genies are you. All the kings, queens, Buddhas, beautiful boys. Inside you. No one can take them away. (Missing Angel Juan.)”

“This very remarkable man
Commends a most practical plan:
You can do what you want
If you don't think you can't,
So don't think you can't – think you can.”

“The only thing worse than a boy who hates you: a boy that loves you.”

“Contrary to what you might think, I don't spend every waking hour thinking about boys."
"Just most waking hours?”

“At that age you think boys have as much personality as coat hangers and, you don't notice their looks.
Then you grow up.”