“Expecting anybody else?' Shane asked Eve. 'Your distant cousin Jack the Ripper dropping by too?'

'Screw you, Collins.”

“No doubt Jack the Ripper excused himself on the grounds that it was human nature.”

“Any instructions?” Carpenter said.
“Yeah,” Shane said. “Shoot anybody who looks at Agnes funny. And anybody else you don’t like. I’m getting tired of this shi*.”
“Somebody needs a hug,” Carpenter said.
“Humor,” Shane said. “Har.”

“Eve: She told me last!
Shane: Boyfriend!
Michael: Landlord!
Eve: Crap. Right. Next time you sell your soul to the devil, I get first contact!”

“Hell’s put in a skating rink,” Shane said. “This is actually edible, Eve.”

“Better be," Eve said. She mock-bit at his finger. "I could totally date somebody else, you know."
"And I could rent out your room."
"And I could put your game console on eBay."
"Hey," Shane protested. "Now you're just being mean.”

“As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper.”

“Shane dragged Eve's suitcase into the room and dumped it on the floor beside her bed. “Hey, Dark Princess? Here’s your crap. Also, bite me.”

“Faster!" Shane yelled. Eve hit the gas hard, and whipped around a slower-moving van. The firing ceased, at least for now. "You see why I didn't want you to stop?"
"Okay, your father is officially!" Eve yelled. "Oh my God, look at my car!”

“Given enough time humans will screw up Wikipedia just as they have screwed up everything else, but so far it's not too bad.”