“Statutory Warning:These stunts have been performed by an expert. Please don't try at home.”

— V. V. S. Laxman

Akash Chopra http://www.scrolldroll.com/quotes-about-vvs-laxman-that-show-he-is-truly-very-very-special/

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V. V. S. Laxman 17

former Indian cricketer 1974

Tite Kubo (1977) Japanese manga artist

“In their work, designers often become expert with the device they are designing. Users are often expert at the task they are trying to perform with the device. […] Professional designers are usually aware of the pitfalls. But most design is not done by professional designers, it is done by engineers, programmers, and managers.”

Donald A. Norman book The Design of Everyday Things

Source: The Design of Everyday Things (1988, 2002), Ch. 6, p. 156.

“I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

Bill Cosby (1937) American actor, comedian, author, producer, musician, activist

Originally from Herbert Bayard Swope (1882-1958); often attributed to Cosby, he actually cites this as a sound advice he once read elsewhere, in "Dr. Bill Cosby" in Ebony, Vol. 32, No. 8 (June 1977), p. 136
Misattributed

“I am not an expert at praying, as you know. But can you please help me? I am in desperate need of help. I don't know what to do. I need an answer. Please tell me what to do…”

Elizabeth Gilbert book Eat, Pray, Love

Source: Eat, Pray, Love

“Call me hardhearted, call me cynical, but please don't call me if they make Home Alone 3.”

Roger Ebert (1942–2013) American film critic, author, journalist, and TV presenter

Review http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/home-alone-2-lost-in-new-york-1992 of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (20 November 1992)
Reviews, Two star reviews