“Yeah, that’s exactly what I want. To help my girlfriend get her old boyfriend back.”

“My marriage is on the rocks again; yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend. ”

“No girl wants a secretly gay boyfriend, every dude wants a secretly gay girlfriend.”

“I want to get an abortion. But my boyfriend and I are having trouble conceiving.”

“Yeah, I loved her. I couldn't help it. She was my brother.”

“Your boyfriends might be angry, my girlfriends might be blue. But no one can deny it, from now on I love you.”

“My girlfriend: sophomore honors student, demigod, and—oh, yeah—head architect for redesigning the palace of the gods on Mount Olympus in her spare time.”

“This is what I wanted. This guy. This life. This me. I was never getting my old life back, and I didn't care. I was happy. I was safe. I was right where I wanted to be.”

“He has no right to threaten my boyfriends. I'm eighteen. An adult. I don't need his help. I can threaten my boyfriends myself.”

“It was that pathetic feeling of not having a hot girlfriend on my arm while some other boys in the theatre did. What I truly wanted… what I truly NEEDED, was a girlfriend. I needed a girl’s love. I needed to feel worthy as a male. For so long I have felt worthless, and it’s all girls’ fault. No girl wanted to be my girlfriend.”