Greg Behrendt citations

“A man who wants to make a relationship work will move mountains to keep the
woman he loves”

“Don’t spend your time on and give your heart to any guy who makes you wonder about anything
related to his feelings for you”

“Don’t be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You are deeply missable. However, he’s still the same person who just broke up with you. Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he’s choosing, every day, not to be with you.”

“You picked a lemon, throw it away lemonade is overrated. Freaks should remain at the circus, not in your apartment. You already have one asshole. You don’t need another. Make a space in your life for the glorious things you deserve. Have faith.”

“Busy' is another word for 'asshole'. 'Asshole' is another word for the guy you're dating.”

“Because here’s what guys don’t do if they can’t live without you: They don’t break up with you.”

“Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with”

“Alone also means available for someone outstanding.”

“When it comes to men, deal with them as they are, not how you’d like them to be.”

“If the guy you’re dating doesn’t seem to be completely into you, or you feel the need to start ‘figuring him out,’ please consider the glorious thought that he might just not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find someone that is.”

“I believe in love the verb, not the noun.”

“Always be classy. Never be crazy.”

“If a guy truly likes you, but for personal reasons he needs to take things slow, he will let you know that immediately. He won’t keep you guessing,
because he’ll want to make sure you don’t get frustrated and go away.”

“I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.”

“He doesn’t have to love your CD collection. He doesn’t have to love your shoes. But any good, mature guy better make an attempt to love your friends and family—especially when they’re great.”

“The quickest way to rectify that mistake (choosing the wrong person) is by learning from that, moving on, and choosing much more wisely in the future.”

“We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the
one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.”

“If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.”

“Don't waste the pretty”

“.. he may love you, he may miss you, but ultimately he's just not that into you.”

“Don't you want the guy who'll forget about all the other things in his life before he forgets about you?”

“If a man is really into you, nothing will stop him from being with you - including a fear of intimacy.”

“The only reason he can miss you is because he’s choosing, every day, not to be with you.”

“Remember always what you set out to get, and please don’t settle for less.”

“You already have one asshole, you don't need another one”

“Why should you feel honored for getting scraps of his time?”

“But he was so great!' Yes, and the people who got on the Titanic thought they were going on a vacation”

“Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)”

“A man would rather be trampled by elephants on fire than tell you he's just not that into you.”