Derek Landy citations

Page 3

“We punch people, Valkyrie. That’s who we are. Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.”

“Valkyrie: “You are such a moron.”
Skulduggery: “Don't be jealous of my genius.”

“I love you all, even those I don’t particularly like. That’s you, Beryl.”

“Well, for future reference, this is my serious face.”

“Found something?”
“No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more floor.”

“You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.”

“Then I reckon we got ourselves a good old-fashioned standoff."
…
Nobody moved, or said anything, for the next few moments.
"Old-fashioned standoffs are mighty borin”

“So he has no head'
'Thats usually what headless means'
'No head at all?'
'Your really not getting the whole headless thing are you?'
'Its just kind of silly even for us…”

“An untied shoelace can be dangerous,' he said.
'I could have tripped.'
She stared at him. A moment dragged by.
'I'm joking,' he said at last.
She relaxed. 'Really?'
'Absolutely. I would never have tripped. I'm far too graceful.”

“By the way, all joking aside, do I call you Ghastly or Elder Bespoke?'
'You can call me whatever you like.'
Vex nodded. 'Thank you, Gladys.”

“I think zombies are kind of cute.”
“Seriously?”
“I may be thinking about bunnies. Which one has the fluffy little tail, zombies or bunnies?”
“Bunnies.”
“Then it’s bunnies I’m thinking of.”

“They might be kittens," she said hopefully.
"They're stalking us."
"They might be shy."
"I don't think it's kittens, Valkyrie."
"Puppies, then?”

“I woke up, a bag of bones. Literally. They had gathered up my bones and put them in a bag and thrown the bag into a river.”

“Well, to put it delicately, she has the power to suck out people's brains.”

“This is your one chance. Tell me where the key is."
"Okay."
Serpine raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
"No, only joking. Do your worst.”

“Come and have a go, if you think you're hard enough”

“He crouched at the car window and looked in. 'What a lovely family you have. What a charming family. They're all lovely. Except for that one.' His finger jabbed the glass. 'That one's a bit ugly.”

“But if you can confront your inner demons—"

"I did confront my inner demon. I punched him in the face and he exploded."

Valkyrie had to laugh. "But now he's back."

"Of course he's back. He's resourceful. He isinner demon, after all.”

“Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.'

And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.”

“Plans are invitation to disappointment.”

“Are you taking my hat hostage?”

“I try not to underestimate my opponents, no matter how ridiculous their beards.”

“Oh, China. How I have missed you.'
'And I have missed you, Eliza. But don't worry, next time my aim will be better.”

“Clarabelle laughed like she'd just heard the funniest thing ever. "Of course you HOPE you won't die, Valkyrie! Who would HOPE to die? That's just SILLY! But you probably WILL die, that's what I'm saying. Don't you think so?”

“I would love to have a battle of wits with you, Bison, but I doubt it would be a fair fight.'
'Shut your face.'
'Exactly my point.”

“The world is bigger than you know, and scarier than you might imagine. The only currency worth anything is being true to yourself, and the only goal worth seeking is finding out who you truly are.”

“If there is one regret that I have had in my life, it is that I never fathered any children. There are times, when I look at what Fergus and Beryl have produced, when I consider myself fortunate, but there are also times when it breaks my heart.”

“It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, your
beard’s stupid.”
“Isn’t this fun?” Skulduggery said brightly. “The three of us
getting along so well.”

“He looked at her. “We’re meant to be together…”
“And this is exactly what I mean.”
“Our love is written in the stars.”
“And there you go again.”
“I love you.”
“You bore me.”