Derek Landy citations

Page 2

“A living skeleton isn't enough for you, is it? What does it take to impress young people these days?”

“Suddenly Saracen Rue looked old and tired, and Skulduggery Pleasant came into focus as what he really was – a genius, a killer, a tortured soul, and the only true dead man among them.”

“Violence?"Skulduggery said. "Violence is never the answer, until it's the only answer.”

“I am a rational man, but haven't you heard? i'm also insane. It gives me a unique perspective on things.”

“Tides do what tides do–they turn.”

“Honesty is, honestly, the best policy,” said Saracen. “But when honesty doesn’t work, lie, and lie convincingly.”

“I don’t want a perfectly safe weapon. I want a dangerous weapon that hurts people.”
He took the stick from her, rapped it against her head. She howled and he nodded.
“See? It hurts people.”

“Punishment is not the answer. Punishment is easy. It’s lazy. Redemption is hard. Redemption makes you work.”
-Skulduggery”

“Peace means nothing without freedom.”

“I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.”

“We don’t do what we do for the glory or the fame or the credit; we do it for the quiet satisfaction of making the world a better place, saving the lives of innocents, and being better than you are.”

“Oh, escape is easy once you have the right plan.'
'Do we have the right plan?'
'Not yet.'
'Do we have any plan?'
'Not yet.”

“Bravery is the acknowledgment and the conquering of fear.”

“Because I’m an English ninja,” Tanith replied. “We’re just like regular ninjas, except we wear leather and flirt more.”

“She wants to be polite and not hurt your feelings, so she's not going to laugh right now. But inside, inside she's laughing.”

“Dexter, please put your shirt on. Valkyrie’s getting distracted.”
“I’m not,” she said, then smiled at Vex. “You don’t have to put your shirt on.”

“You can't leave me alone," she said, following him into the living room.
"Yes," he corrected, "I can. You'll be perfectly safe."
"The front door's off!"
"Well, yes. You'll be perfectly safe as long as they don't come through the front door.”

“Sanguine chuckled. "I like you, boy. You got optimism in these bones. I like you so much that I ain't gonna tell you what I did to poor old Jethro, the first Jethro, may he rest in peace, may they someday find his head.”

“You have an amazing ability to depress me sometimes, you know that?"
"I try my best.”

“Valkyrie smiled patiently. "I like how you do your make-up. Do you use a brush, or just dip your head in the bucket?”

“Are you going to shoot me?' Vengeous sneered. 'I wouldn't be surprised. What would a thing like you know about honor? Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.'

And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.”

“They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said.

China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.”

“I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly littering.”

“What is it?' Stephanie whispered.
'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.'
She looked at Skulduggery. 'You don't know what it is, do you?'
'I told you what it is, it's a horrible monster. Now shut up before it comes over here and eats us.”

“Kindness suits you."

"Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.”

“So that plan worked out well.'

Skulduggery, your entire plan consisted of, and I quote, "Let's get up close and then see what happens."'

All the same,' he said, 'I think the whole thing worked out rather beautifully.”

“It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows -”

“Valkyrie, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your friend is most likely dead.”
“Of course he’s dead. He’s a skeleton.”

“What would killing the Elders result in?"
"Panic? Fear? Three empty parking spaces in the Sanctuary?”